I started my “WHO AM I?” journey when I was 28. I questioned my purpose on this planet.
“There must be more than this.”
I really wanted to change the world. Through my work as a media maker, I knew I was sorta doing it.
But it didn’t feel right. I didn’t feel fulfilled.
There was always an internal struggle.
“Am I doing enough?”
Despite having one of the most privileged careers in the world as a Producer and Director for (inter)national television programs, despite having a powerful medium to amplify personal voices and shape public perspectives, despite having the responsibility of igniting hope –
My own story, the one I tell myself, the one that questions, “Am I doing enough?” extinguished the very hope I’d lit up in front the video lens.
And it went on for the first 15 years in my career.
Last week on my birthday, I woke up in the morning with a realization.
I laid in bed, eyes open, wondering if that feeling will go away if I wait long enough. It didn’t.
I felt fulfilled.
This feeling didn’t feel shiny nor new. It felt familiar – like it’s always been there.
And I realized I have been feeling this way for the last 5 years.
This sense of fulfillment has become a friend of mine, and this friend sparks songs of joy and gratitude in my heart every morning.
Click n’ Tweet: “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” @Oprah Winfrey via @taynval
This Birthday, I didn’t feel a need to go-out-there-and-celebrate because I realized I’ve been celebrating everyday. This day didn’t feel very-oh-so-special because everyday has been special.
That evening, I got a slice of pie with a birthday candle.
“Make a wish!” Val insisted.
I watched the light flicker in front of me – heart full. I told my 28 year-old self:
“Thank you. I got what you’ve been looking for. Here, let me share it with you.” And I opened my heart to let her in.
My birthday wish? Is for you reading this, to live a life of celebration.
Tell me, what’re you celebrating right now?
Leave a comment below, we’d both love to hear from you!
♥full of gratitude,
Tay
P.S. If this post has uplifted you, please forward it to a friend, family, or folks you think it would help – anyone who could use a little soul companionship as they seek out the fulfilled version of themselves in this word.
One Comment on ““I waited 37 years to feel this way””
THIS:
I told my 28 year-old self: “Thank you. I got what you’ve been looking for. Here, let me share it with you.” And I opened my heart to let her in.
SO moving and so resonant for me. Celebrating you! The happiest of happies, Tay. May you *continue* to have it ALL.